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Epic Beard Men – Not Ur Uber lyrics
(Check-check)
(Yo, what the-Are you Benjamin?)
(One-two)
(Dog, are you serious right now? I'm gonna need you to get the Hell out of my car. Like now.)

Hey stranger, this here's the banger
This is the long-awaited, highly-anticipated game-changer
Peace Fam, I need a jet, no disrespect
Could ya link a website that I could check?
Well, I've got this digital press-kit. (Grrrr)
One of my peoples put together with minimal effort
I ain't asking for much, just blow me up, that's it
Oh, that's all?
Ch-yeah, my manager says shit, I ain't down for that call, I'm like: 'text it'
Bro, you got a manager?
Bro, I got industry reps that'll advance my career to the next level
Just first, I need to get this debt settled. I paid for that shit
To Hell with them record exec devils
Yeah, they Satanists
They told me I should rap over death metal!
(What!)
I said I'll stomp on you fools like an effects pedal
Yeah, that happened. Ha, well, good luck with your rapping career!
Here, have my drink tickets and have yourself some beer
But I'm sick though! Let me slip this here disc through the slit in your window while you stay parked on my big toe. You'll get home. (No!)
Just let me spit this flow: if every Harry, Dick and Tom, with a demo and a bomb


(Listen to my demo, listen, listen to my demolition.)
Listen to my demo!
(Listen to my demo, listen, listen to my demolition.)
Listen to my demo!
(Listen to my demo, listen, listen to my demolition.)
Listen, just listen

I am not your Uber, I am not your Lyft
I ain't got your ticket, you're not on the list
I am not the one. This is not the time
But, I wish you luck. I hope you get what you ride
(In the parking lot. Jesus.)

He said if I get a second, he'd appreciate the feedback
I wish he woulda mentioned that he really didn't need that
He hit me with a text to tell me when he's back in rehab
I gave him the retweet, he told me 'I can't eat that'
Believe that? I had to book him a show
I had to put him on the track, he said be out on the road
In fact, I put my shit on hold because his was ready to go!
(You telling me you really did so?)
Oh, homie, shit no! No disrespect, I know that this is your year
But the Beard don't care! (Check-it! Oh yeah!)
Two last polar bears squeezed outta our natural habitat
When we go down, we're standing back to back
Loyalty is Royalty, man! (I know that's a fact!)
My cruise is not your Uber, Junior! (Also, fuck that!)


(Get out of the car.)
(Alright, word. Can you call me a cab?)

I'm not your Uber, I'm not your Lyft
I ain't got your ticket, you're not on the list
I am not your lover, I am not your friend
I am not your Uber, you may not get in
'cause I am not the one, and this is not the time
But, I wish you luck. I hope you get what you ride
I am not your lover, I am not your friend
I am not your Uber, you may not get in
Unless you listen to my demo
(Listen, listen to my demo)
Listen to my demo
(Listen to my demo, listen, listen to my demolition.)
Listen to my demo!
(Listen to my demo, listen, listen to my demolition.)
Listen, just listen
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