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Feb 2, 2015
"
getting more bleak
A
A
"A fresh poison each week" is referencing weekly biblical discussion - that beyond the depths of homosexuality views, the church can still be hypocritical about other "gentle sins."
"A fresh poison each week" can reference that the closer to God and His views on homosexuality he gets, the more it hurts him inside to deny his gay feelings.
"A fresh poison each week" can reference that the closer to God and His views on homosexuality he gets, the more it hurts him inside to deny his gay feelings.
Feb 2, 2015
Feb 2, 2015
"
sweeter innocence than our gentle sin
In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene
Only then I am
In the madness and soil of that sad earthly scene
Only then I am
In the "madness" (read: forbidden, lustful, wonderful, sinful, love) of life and the cleansing of death ("soil of that sad earthly scene") is the only things can make him human and the ladder is the only thing that can clean him from his madness.
As alluded to earlier, he believes that he is committing sin, and he believes that only sin can clean him of it.
As alluded to earlier, he believes that he is committing sin, and he believes that only sin can clean him of it.
Feb 2, 2015
"
or kings when the ritual begins
There is no
There is no
I believe the "sweeter innocence" talks about how enjoyable the "gentle" sins are. I wouldn't say "gentle" and "innocent" are truly what they mean on the surface. The sweetest sins, so-to-speak, are often the least gentle - I believe gentle is talking about how gentle it may be on the surface. Something that is normal enjoyable and simple ("gentle") is in fact not so simple at all and can actually prevent you from entering into heaven. "Innocence" describes the lack of intent to be sinful; he can't control what he's attracted to, and that the desires behind his gentle sins are what is truly sweet - and it asks the rhetorical question: "How is something so sweet and gentle so damned upon by God?"
Feb 2, 2015
"
give you my life
[Bridge:]
No masters
[Bridge:]
No masters
I believed "masters or kings" to be a sort of chess reference, that there is no way to win in this sort of ritual (read: relationship with God). He's not the master to himself or his life when enduring the "ritual" and there are no Kings on the board - without a checkmate, the game can't end, and it leaves everyone scrambled and confused, just like how he was growing up.
Could also allude to how the narrator feels like his God has condemned him for something he has no control over, that he never became the "master" or "king" he sought for when establishing his faith in Him.
Could also allude to how the narrator feels like his God has condemned him for something he has no control over, that he never became the "master" or "king" he sought for when establishing his faith in Him.
Feb 2, 2015
"
can sharpen your knife
Offer
Offer
No matter how hard the narrator is trying to repress his feelings, or even how much acceptance he's come to it, he has a bit of animosity directed at himself because of how he grew up - it was always frowned upon, so he'll always frown upon himself even if he recognizes that he shouldn't. He longs for mercy and a "deathless death" - a death beyond the body - to make up for the sins he can't help but commit.
Feb 2, 2015
"
Take me to church
I'll worship like a dog at the
I'll worship like a dog at the
The imagery of the "dog" is quite significant - during mating season, dogs have been known to have sex with the same sex if they cannot find a female. He's saying he'll worship however he pleases, either a female or a male, and that no matter who he's with, he desires to please everyone - even the religion that is quite the hypocrite (see: "shrine of your lies").
The follow up lyrics, ("I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife"), supports the idea that he'll be judged for his sins even though God is supposed to be all loving and forgiving (thus the hypocrisy and lies).
The follow up lyrics, ("I'll tell you my sins so you can sharpen your knife"), supports the idea that he'll be judged for his sins even though God is supposed to be all loving and forgiving (thus the hypocrisy and lies).
Feb 2, 2015
"
but I love it
Command me to be
Command me to be
"Command me to be well" references his early life and the condemnation for who he was.
"Amen. Amen. Amen" repeated three times is very significant in this song, because three is a powerful number when it comes to Christianity. The repetition of "Amen" three times parallels most with Peter's denial of Jesus, since he denied him three times, and that the Church is trying to denounce his sins from him. This parallels perfectly because the return interpretation can work as well: Peter also affirmed his face three times as well, and his past self both denied his homosexuality and accepted it - the exact same order Peter did (denial, but acceptance afterward).
"Amen. Amen. Amen" repeated three times is very significant in this song, because three is a powerful number when it comes to Christianity. The repetition of "Amen" three times parallels most with Peter's denial of Jesus, since he denied him three times, and that the Church is trying to denounce his sins from him. This parallels perfectly because the return interpretation can work as well: Peter also affirmed his face three times as well, and his past self both denied his homosexuality and accepted it - the exact same order Peter did (denial, but acceptance afterward).
Feb 1, 2015
"
'worship in the bedroom'
The only heaven I'll be sent to
Is when
The only heaven I'll be sent to
Is when
He believes that there is no heaven waiting for him, and the only substitute for him will be the worship conducted in the bedroom with his lover.
Could also signify his love for his lover, that he longs to worship them and be with them, that they are his heaven, and there is no need for any other heaven for him.
Supported by the follow up line: "I was born sick, but I love it." He believes that he no longer has a place in heaven, but that's ok with him, because being with them is worth it.
Could also signify his love for his lover, that he longs to worship them and be with them, that they are his heaven, and there is no need for any other heaven for him.
Supported by the follow up line: "I was born sick, but I love it." He believes that he no longer has a place in heaven, but that's ok with him, because being with them is worth it.
Feb 1, 2015
"
church offers no absolution
She tells me
She tells me
The last line, "My church offers no absolution" is continued on in this line, with his partner expressing that he should "worship" them in the bedroom - which is an euphemism for sex. The sex is clearly meant to be a substitute for baptism in this case.
"I should've worshiped her sooner" conveys his disappointment for not finding acceptance for who he was sooner, and the "We were born sick" expresses his self-judgment and ambivalent emotions upon his homosexuality growing up.
The other lines, "If the Heavens ever did speak / She is the true mouthpiece" support the idea that his religion is standing in his way, that he realizes that he should have accepted his feelings for his lover sooner, but that, growing up, it wasn't that easy.
"I should've worshiped her sooner" conveys his disappointment for not finding acceptance for who he was sooner, and the "We were born sick" expresses his self-judgment and ambivalent emotions upon his homosexuality growing up.
The other lines, "If the Heavens ever did speak / She is the true mouthpiece" support the idea that his religion is standing in his way, that he realizes that he should have accepted his feelings for his lover sooner, but that, growing up, it wasn't that easy.
Feb 1, 2015
Feb 1, 2015
"
funeral
Knows everybody's disapproval
I should've worshipped
Knows everybody's disapproval
I should've worshipped
"I should've worshiped her sooner" expresses his regret at not accepting his lover to the oddities "she" has expressed earlier in the song ("Giggle at a funeral") but he, instead, was trusted into a world of complication because of everybody's (read: the church's) disapproval of his lover. The song's overall message is to underline the complications of being a homosexual believer. Condemned from within, and with self-loathing directed at himself, he finds it hard to identify his beliefs and what is right and what is wrong and how to cope with it all.
Feb 1, 2015
"
]
My lover's got
My lover's got
After listening to this song a few times, I've come to the conclusion that the She pronouns are only there to suggest that his lover is like a wife to him, but in face, the She is his male lover. The fact that his lover is male is the "giggle at the funeral" that "everybody's disapproval" is aimed at.