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My pain is self-chosen
At least, so The Prophet says
I could either burn
Or cut off my pride and buy some time
A head full of lies is the weight, tied to my waist

The River of Deceit pulls down, oh oh
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down (x4)

My pain is self-chosen
At least I believe it to be
I could either drown
Or pull off my skin and swim to shore
Now I can grow a beautiful shell for all to see

The River of Deceit pulls down, yeah
The only direction we flow is down
Down, oh down (x4)

The pain is self-chosen, yeah
Our pain is self-chosen



Lyrics taken from http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/mad_season/river_of_deceit.html

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  • u
    +1
    UnregisteredFeb 10, 2014 at 3:29 am
    The first time I heard this song I knew the voice sounded familiar, but couldn't put a name on him. I have always loved Alice In Chains. I am a recovering drug addict and now every time I hear it I can relate to Layne's message. This song just hits my soul, I think it's because you can feel the vulnerability in Layne's vocals, his voice recreates those days of cravings and withdrawal symptoms. You can truly feel his pain and we know we are killing are selves by using but it's just so painful to stop and it feels so good to use, rest in peace Layne, nobody can imitate your sound or your passion! I love your music.
  • u
    +1
    UnregisteredDec 8, 2013 at 2:44 pm
    To be honest first time I listened to this I didn't like it, but then again after listening to dirt and tripod it was just different, but upon listening to it today it really spoke to me actually I cried like a baby amid my own addictions, a few words on the meaning of the song if you want to call it that according to Wikipedia and the drummer it was lyrically, was inspired by The Prophet by Khalil Gibran, which Staley read during the making of the album. Drummer Barrett Martin said, "Layne Staley felt as though he was on a spiritual mission through his music. Not a rock mission, a spiritual mission". Just goes to show he was trying to do a lot of soul searching to find peace or god or whatever in his music from the chaos of life and addiction. Love peace and god bless you Layne your adored and missed by many, also a shout out to John Baker Saunders born September 23, 1954 - January 15, 1999 who also died from an overdose of heroin. Peace love and god bless.
  • p
    +1
    pluckedangelJun 21, 2011 at 11:15 pm
    I am in recovery for drugs and alcohol, as well as an eating disorder. The lyrics, as many times as I have jammed this cd, still hit home. Whatever your addiction, or affliction, you can relate in some way or another. It's a damn shame he isn't around to open more avenues for us all. RIP Layne... Your music lives on...
  • a
    -0
    ALateStartJun 11, 2011 at 5:59 am
    I wasn't familiar w MAD SEASON when I heard the song for the first time but, being an addict in recovery, I knew exactly what Layne was talkin abt. Self destruction: the insanity of the disease. Sometimes I miss the pain as crazy as it sounds. All I have is today. This moment. We're damned: folks like us. Posting this helped me. Thank u Father
  • m
    -0
    MikesGravityJan 3, 2010 at 6:20 am
    I dug out my Mad Season album today and love it as much as I did when it was released. Obviously his pain (drugs) was self chosen and his life (the river) flows down and down in a spiral. He refers to himself and other addicts like him.

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