Mention the Lord of the Rings just once more,
And I'll more than likely kill you.
"Moorecock, Moorecock, Michael Moorecock"
You fervently moan.
Is this a wok that you sholve down my throat,
Or are you just pleased to see me?
Brian Moore's head looks uncannily like London Planetarium.
And all those people
Who you, romantically,
Like to still believe are alive,
So I'll wipe my snot
On the arm of your chair
As you put another Roger Dean poster
On the wall.
God, I could murder a Cadbury's Flake,
Then I guess you wouldn't let me into heaven.
Or maybe you would 'cause their adverts promote oral s**!
A Romani bint in a field with her paints,
Suggesting we faint at her beauty,
But she's got "Dickie Davis Eyes!"
Chorus x 2
Lyrics taken from http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/h/half_man_half_biscuit/dickie_davies_eyes.html