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Quite often I get a thinking
How as kids we got by
Like christmas time in our house
We couldn't even afford a fire

But we made do in our house
Back then when I was young
Dad used to suck a peppermint
And we'd all sit round his tongue

We couldn't afford no tinsel
On our christmas tree
So we'd just wheel old grandad in
And make the old c*** sneeze... Atchoo

Wheel him round the other side granny... Atchoo

Well things change so bloody fast
I got children now of me own
Now I heard 'em unwrap their presents
Last night when I got home

Santa claus you c***
Where's my f*****g bike
I've unwrapped all this other junk
There's nothing what I like

I've wrote you a letter
And I've come to see you twice
You geriatric wanker
Where's my f*****g bike

If I wanted a pair of f*****g shoes
I would've f*****g asked
This cowboy suit and ping-pong set
You can stick right up your arse

You went and mucked my order up
It's enough to make you spew
It's not just me that's pissed off
My sister's cheesed off too

Santa claus you c***
Where's my f*****g pram
You promised me you f*****g c***
You know who I am

Cause I'm the little girl
You made sit right on your hand
Never mind your ho ho ho
Where's my f*****g pram

Next time I go to see him
I'm gonna punch him in the guts
Set his f*****g reindeer loose
Kick rudolf in the nuts

Just you wait til next year
'Til we get to that store
A mate of my little sister
'll come stomping through that door

Hey mums and dads just check his breath
And watch his bloodshot eyes
Don't listen to him boys and girls
Cause he tells f*****g lies

He's a pisstake and a pervert
He's not even f*****g bright
Cause that f*****g wanker
Forgot my f*****g bike

Hey santa claus you c***
Where's my f*****g bike
I've unwrapped all this other junk
There's nothing what I like

I wrote you a f*****g letter
And I came to see you twice
You geriatric wanker
Forgot my f*****g bike

Yeah I'm gonna tell my dad on you
F*****g punch your head in.... C***
I saw mummy sucking santa



Lyrics taken from http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/u/uk_subs/hey_santa.html

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