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I went down to the local bar
To buy my daddy a big cigar
When I got home he was dead
Somebody shot him in the head
Oh dear daddy
You're not gonna see me grieve
'Cause you brought out the worst in me
(Spoken:)
Yep! It's all true.
It's true. It makes me cry.
When the funeral was through
I had myself a barbecue
Daddy's bones they sure taste good
I couldn't have stopped; if only I could
Oh dear daddy
You're not gonna see me sad
'Cause everything you did was bad



Lyrics taken from http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/m/madonna/the_funny_song_oh_dear_daddy.html

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