Close To Me lyrics

All these things I do to keep you close to me
And every day's another day from what we used to be
I don't know what I've been thinking
'Cause this is much like hell
It's days like this, I must insist
I'm not doing so well
[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/b/ballyhoo/close_to_me.html ]
Oh no, get lost in you
Like you know, I often do
And I wonder if you're proud of me
If you can hear me, shout at me
I need to kill this doubt in me for good
So help me now to let you go
So I can live

I think about these last 10 years
And what they've done to me
And I don't think it's worth it
'Cause it's just not fun to me
What if I just killed myself
And never spoke again?
Could you make your way back through the darkness
And meet me at the end?