I've long been puzzled by the first line, "I closed my eyes, drew back the curtains, to see for certain what I thought I knew". To me it is a crypic reference to the close minded attitude that it is possible to have. You only see what you want to see. You only harm yourself by refusing to look at the whole argument, all the pros and cons. I was brought up in a Christian church environment where the ministers acted like the entire history of Western Philosophy and higher Bible criticism had never happened. Also I self censored, I was too busy trying to cling to narrow dogma, too afraid to explore other sides of the argument. Cowering before Orthodoxy only leaves you lop-sided and intellectually stunted. We need to seek the truth and value intellectual honesty. Then we might be able to take the log out of our own eye. Try author Robert M Price, 'The reason driven life', or John W. Loftus, Valerie Tarico, Dan Barker, Victor J. Stenger if you want to open your eyes and see what is really out the window.