If I had a hammer, I'd build a house for two.
And if I had a sailing ship, I'd take a trip with you.
And if I had a poets hand, I'd write a verse for thee.
And if I had the painter's touch, on canvas you'd be.
But I don't have a hammer
And I don't have a ship
So I can't build your house
And we can't take a trip
And I'll never be a poet
Nor have the painter's grace
So I'll never write your verse
Nor immortalize your face
omg. this is another funny song by stephen lynch. this song is something like a guy promising you everything only to find out in the end that it was all a lie, a joke. i think thats what this song is trying to say but in a funny version.