Hoedown lyrics

I drink tequila every night for about a year
I drink it with my best friend and I chase it down with beer
But yesterday I had to quit
It changed my life (I'll tell you what)
The other day I woke up naked with my brothers wife

Arhh I love me hoedowns a good time to be had
I declare this be the best hoedown across the land
A leader a bacardi is like a chest of treasure
And when the rum is gone
The bottle in her butt for pleasure

Hello my name is Jimmy
And I've got to take a crump
It feels like an explosion down in me rump
So take some beer and whiskey
It don' mean no harm
Cause Im a little leprechuan and eat my lucky charms

I know I look pathetic
And no I dont feel fine
Im very fuckin angry
I could commit a crime
When I went to sleep last night I was same old Chris
But somehow over night I grew a perfect set of tits

I wanted a burrito but a tachos all they had
I figured they could make me one but the guy got really mad
He slapped me across my face and " Now listen to me Bro,
Im telling you just one more time no burritos just tachos"

Hello my name is peter and this here is my song
I've been eating tea and crumpits four fucking years to long
I have an idea if you ever get sick
I wont give you a shot but I'll give you my english prick

Today I was arrested
Oh well to bad for you
I dont see whats wrong with shitting on the beach
I guess I'll sit in jail until they let me go or until they find out Im supposed to be in Mexico
IN MEXICO