My Fondest Childhood Memories lyrics

When I was 10 I had a live-in babysitter
She had a pet kangaroo, wore big breasts and feathers
She gave me ice cream every time I screamed and hollered
I loved her 'till I caught her sexing my father
She gonna hurt you daddy, never again, she wasn't a friend, so I killed her
She gonna hurt you daddy, never again, she wasn't a friend, so I killed her

When I was 13 the plumber stopped by
The house was flooding and no one knew why
Within no time at all he got rid of the water
And I was grateful 'till I caught him plunging my mother
He gonna hurt you momma, never again (Never again), he wasn't a friend, so I killed him
He gonna hurt you momma, never again (She don't want to go), he wasn't a friend (No he wasn't) so I killed him (So I killed him)
He gonna hurt you momma (I killed him), never again (Never again), he wasn't a friend (Never again), so I killed him
And I don't feel bad about it
Say, say, say what?
And I don't feel bad about it
These are my fondest childhood memories
I, and I was just a kid, so they let me go despite the murders that I did
All grown up now as you can see, my parents are still happily married thanks to me
She gonna hurt you daddy, never again (Never again), she wasn't a friend, so I killed her (yeah I killed her)
She gonna hurt you daddy, never again, she wasn't a friend, so I killed her
He gonna hurt you momma, never again (Never again)
He wasn't a friend (She no longer hurt you daddy), so I killed him (Go on hit your mother)
He gonna hurt you momma, never again (So I killed him), he wasn't a friend (So I killed him), so I killed him

These are my fondest childhood memories