M. H. ’s Jokes lyrics

[mes is the one swearing a lot]Anyway, this guy goes fuckin ’ell, you don’ ’alf complain for an eleven year old do you? Ooooohhhh-that machine is nice-fuck off it took me ages to get that, yeah-i want that machine-yeah what yeah right,-clean joke-wuh-if I tell a good clean joke, can I have that? -no you fuckin can’t-i want it, honest-you can’t have it-there’s no vus coming up there at all. is it supposed to have vus on it? -no, it’s not. ’s fuckin’ my machine, that. keep your hands off it.-it’s your machine. it’s a vu-less machine. sure it’s recording, mark? better turn the volume up. ok, what d’you call a guy with a spade in his head? doug.-jesus, that’s pathetic.-what d’you call a guy who’s been dead and buried for 30,000 years? pete. (nervous laugh) come on, then, astound me with your wit, mark.[cut]-come on, rewind it, let’s see what you had to say.-erm, we’ve been through this before, haven’t we? -right I’ll do it for the tape like all them other bands do, like we’ve done it once, but the cameras weren’t rolling-nah, I’m thinking of my joke actually.-so I’m reading frank zappa, right, it’s an au- it’s a biography by frank zappa-right [mes totally disinterested]-and - errrr - it’s 1988, I go tup to 1988 and the book is about how many things he released, when he released it-hrrrrrrghhhhhm-how many offshoots and all this shit, and all of a sudden I’m realising, errr-more interested when you were talking about napoleon actually
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