Happiness lyrics

it's really sad but amazing i think it is about his girlfriend and he really loved her and he didn't appreciate her life and she was dying
which i believe is "drowning in the light" and ran to get help or something and when he came back she was dead now he lies in bed pondering why he should even get up without her so now i believe he is paceing in the church and thinking about moving on but saying that wont help he will never forget her so he listens to her answering machine just to hear her voice one more time but he can't let go. everybody is telling it's not his fault and he is blaming him self and saying there is nothing worth living for anymore he is saying people are asking him for directions in life as if he has all the answers and now he is flirting with the thought of suicide