Mr. Mistoffolees lyrics

The Rum Tum Tugger calls in "Mr. Mistoffolees," the original
"conjuring cat" to use his magical powers to bring back their
leader. Mistoffolees succeeds in getting back all of the lights,
relocating Old Deuteronomy, and showing off his magic tricks,
including his infamous "conjuring turn."

SOLO:
You ought to ask Mr. Mistoffolees!
The original conjuring cat

The greatest magicians have something to learn
From Mister Mistoffolees' conjuring turn
And you'll all say

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

He is quiet, he is small, he is black
From the ears to the tip of his tail
He can creep through the tiniest crack
He can walk on the narrowest rail

He can pick any card from a pack
He is equally cunning with dice
He is always deceiving you into believing
That he's only hunting for mice

He can play any trick with a cork
Or a spoon and a bit of fish paste
If you look for a knife or a fork
And you think it is merely misplaced

You have seen it one moment and then it's gone!
But you find it next week lying on the lawn
And we all say

ALL:
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

MR. MISTOFFOLEES:
Well! My manner is vague and aloof
You would think there was nobody shyer
But voice has been heard on the roof
When I was curled up by the fire

And I've sometimes been heard by the fire
When I was about on the roof
At least they all heard that somebody purred
Which is uncontestable proof of my singular magical powers
And I've known the family to call me in from the garden for hours
While I was asleep in the hall

SOLO:
And not long ago this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat

ALL:
And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

SOLO:
And not long ago this phenomenal cat
Produced seven kittens right out of a hat

ALL:
And we all say
Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

Oh! Well I never was there ever
A cat so clever as magical Mr. Mistoffolees

SOLO:
Ladies and gentlemen, I give you the magical Mr. Mistoffolees!